This week I thought about some dads who are challenged to stay engaged with their children. I thought about dads experiencing Prom night, driving lessons, moving to middle school and high school next fall and sending their kids away to camps this summer. I am reminded of my thoughts in Be There Dad about our struggle to be everywhere. (page 215)
The Thirst
It was a hot September afternoon on the soccer practice field and my micro soccer players were ready for a break. I blew the whistle and yelled, “Water! Get your water bottle and bring it to the circle.” Then, I added, “But don’t drink, yet!!” I got a few confused looks as the small players scurried to the bench to retrieve their bottles. Quickly they all circled around me like they always did at water break. All were red-cheeked, some still panting, they were looking for me to give them permission to drink.
Before I did, I had them sit down. Calmly and quietly, I asked, “Are you thirsty?” “Yes,” was the reply. I asked, “Would you like some of your water?” “Yes, yes…” “Do you think it will taste good?” “Yes, yes, can we just take a drink?” I waited another moment that seemed like forever, and then said, “I want you to remember how you feel right now … another pause, then, “OK, have a drink”. Immediately bottles turned up and a collective sucking sound came from all around me. Slurp, slurp … water running down chins. Then, one by one came the obligatory, “AAHH!” They had what they wanted. That tasted good.
Water, Water Everywhere
Then, I asked, “How did you feel before I let you drink?” They thought a moment, then “I felt real thirsty!” “Did you think the water would make you feel better? “Yes.” I went on. “Why do you need water?” “We need it to live!” “Good answer.” “We have to have water or we will shrivel up and die.” Right again. How often do we need water?” “All the time.” “Right. We cannot go very long without it. We drink water all the time.”
I asked another series of questions. “Where do we get water? In our houses?” “Sure.” “From a faucet in the kitchen? From the bottle in the refrigerator? The sink in the bathroom?” The responses kept coming, “Yes, yes, yes.” “Can we find water anywhere else when we need it? At Grandma’s house? At a restaurant? A drinking fountain at school?” “Yes, yes, yes.” “What do we drink water from? Water bottles? A glass? A paper cup? All those things and many more. It doesn’t matter how we drink it, we just need it.”
So water is something that makes us feel better. It is something that we must have to live. We feel thirsty when we need it. Because we need it so much, we have many places where we can get it all the time. And it comes to us in many forms. Water is a good thing. It is all around us. Thank goodness for water! A simple lesson in biology, but I had more in mind.
I went on to use the exercise as a devotional by relating how Jesus is present everywhere in our lives, just like the water. At the end of practice that day, the hot, sweaty, tired players walked with parents to their cars. As they did, one small boy named Mark was heard to say to his dad, “Boy, I’m thirsty. I think I’ll take a drink of Jesus!”
Aren’t Dads Like Water?
This is a nice story. It was a successful devotional for a soccer team tying an everyday experience to Jesus. The kids got the point. Perhaps they thought about water and Jesus differently from that time forward.
For Be There Dads, I believe this story can teach a similar lesson. Another parable in my life. Aren’t dads like water, too? Don’t our kids need us to live better lives? Don’t they need us when they are thirsty? Whether their needs are physical, emotional or spiritual? Don’t they have the desire to reach out for us at almost any time? Don’t they want to know that we are always there just like water? I think they do.
And just like water, if we choose, we can be wherever they are. Our presence evolves as they grow. At first, we can be there physically. Holding the bike on the first ride without training wheels. Holding their hands as they swing a baseball bat. Watching and cheering from the stands at a soccer game. Sitting quietly, and then applauding politely at the piano recital.
Sometimes they reach out for a drink of dad. Crawling onto our laps as we watch TV to say they are tired. Running to meet us coming home from work to tell us about the new friend they made at school that day. A high five after scoring a goal.
Then, there will be times we are “there” when we cannot be physically.
The letter from overnight camp to tell about the fish he caught that afternoon. The text from the quiet of her dorm room on the first night at college. And, the cell phone call from the side of the road just after his first fender bender.
And finally, there will be the times when there is no contact at all. Taking the SATs. Driving solo in the car for the first time. And when she is thinking about how to answer the question, “Will you marry me?’ She will feel the presence of her Be There Dad and it will support her own confidence and wisdom.
I Think I’ll Take a Drink
At these times and many others, our children, at all the ages and stages, will have a need for a drink of dad. To see us, to hear us, to touch us. To quench their thirst. To give them comfort. To give them guidance and assurance. They need to know we will be there for them, always. Just like water, our presence will be a part of their lives in different ways, in different places, to different degrees. They will carry the lessons we teach them forever.
Perhaps success sounds a lot like our child saying, “Boy, I am thirsty, I think I’ll take a drink of dad.”
