Like many others who seek to be informed, I have watched parts of both the Republican and Democratic national conventions this summer. While I know the conventions are productions designed to convince viewers to vote one way, full of bright lights, flashy videos, loud music and good-looking popular celebrities; this week as I watched the DNC I was able to see something more. Humanity and goodness are still alive and well in most of our fellow citizens. Sometimes we have to put on blinders to see it.
Listening with Closed Eyes
The back story is that I recently had surgery on my eye. During the healing process, sometimes it is a challenge for me to focus. So late in the evening when the “headliners” were speaking at the convention, my eyes were tired and my vision occasionally got a little blurry. What seemed at the time to be an annoyance, turned into a blessing.
To rest my tired eyes, periodically I would close them and just listen to the speaker. I realized that I was doing what I have been suggesting to others. Rather than looking at a person’s appearance or what they were wearing; rather than being awed by the size and scope of the arena; rather than being influenced by the lights, flashing screens and other hoopla in the arena; I could only focus on the words coming from the speaker. I was forced to listen to the content of their remarks.
My situation reminded me of how we often engage in relationships day to day. Is the person in the $1,000 suit more worthy of our attention than the one in the t-shirt? Is the resident of the large home more insightful than the one living in a tent? Is the person who looks more like me the one we should listen to first? Is the appearance of celebrity, electric music and visual effects blurring what a person is really saying?
I found that when I closed my eyes, my heart opened to receive the message. A few things that encouraged me came into clear focus. .
Values Endure
Repeatedly I heard people speak about the influence of their parents and grandparents.
I heard people talk about how those folks had instilled values in them that had made them fulfill their potential and promise. Hard work. Perseverance. Integrity. Compassion. Empathy. Honesty. And even joy.
I heard speaker’s talk about the sacrifice parents made so their children could have a better life. So they could reach for their dreams. Regardless of their education and other accomplishments, these speakers told about the core values their families had placed in their backpacks. They talked about their gratitude for these mentors, but also about their own responsibility to carry those values and to pass them onto the next generation. In their own words these speakers related how the power of presence had shaped their journeys. In the image of their mentors, they encouraged us not to complain, but to do something. I was inspired to continue our work at Be There Dad. Values endure.
Only a Cough Away
I heard one speaker talk about the importance of our connections to each other. He used the pandemic as an example. As the virus spread, he said that people were dependent upon each other to halt the spread. In that time, the health of each of us was impacted by the health of all of us. In the period when so many were dying, the lives of each of us was in the hands of others. Like the story of the Good Samaritan, in our own history, everyone became our neighbor and we were encouraged to care for the others in our community. He went on to say that the health of his children depended upon the health of other children. Their health depended upon the health of children in rural Georgia; and the children in urban Atlanta and New York City. The children in Gaza and Israel. Jewish children and Palestinians. And all the others around the world. He said, our health and well-being is just a “cough away.”
With my eyes closed, his message was clear, too. Our well-being. Our success. Our long-term prosperity are all dependent upon the health, success and prosperity of others. We all will be better off when every child is fed; when every child has a place to sleep; when every child has someone to talk to and depend on. When every child has felt the presence of someone who cares in their life. Among our children, the viruses of loneliness, self-doubt, lack of opportunity and isolation still exist. So, the rallying cry of Be There Dad continues to be relevant. Nobody wins until we all do.
Hope Can Lead Us
Lastly, I heard speakers encourage us to rekindle hope. They submitted that hope
is still alive and well in our country. Hope is a powerful thing. The foundation of that power comes from the belief in our fundamental values and our responsibility to take care of each other. We must live by the values we have been taught by our mentors, then pass them on to our children. We must believe that our prosperity, our potential and our purpose are dependent upon us helping all our neighbors find their own prosperity, potential and purpose. If we work together we can restore the hope in this country. I heard these words spoken about our country, but I felt the need in our own community. Our work must go on.
This is a time when folks are campaigning against each other. They are jockeying for position. They are deploying all kinds of strategies and tactics, just trying to win. But I heard and believe this. There are still millions of people in this country who believe in goodness and hope, right and wrong. There are people who are trying to do the right things for our children. Amidst the hoopla, noise and negativity, the good still shines through. I learned that if I closed my eyes to all the distractions and just listened, I could hear those nuggets of goodness and hope. Those virtues are held by the dads and men in our community. They can become a light shining on the hill pointing the way to the future. We need only to have the courage to climb the hill. We need to share the goodness with all the children of the next generation.
Like a political campaign, success depends on a good “ground game”. People involved at the local level engaging others and making a difference. In the next few weeks, dads groups will be recruiting men to become involved in their schools. Choose to join. Elsewhere there will be opportunities to start groups where there are none. Volunteer to start one. Share your values. Engage your neighbor. Embrace the goodness and hope. Close your eyes and open your heart.
