On many occasions, coaching kids has given me perspective on the world around us. Sometimes explaining things to young kids helps me understand the path forward. This week, I had one of those moments.
A Fairy Tale
When I coached my first soccer team of micros (mostly kindergartners) I wondered if they really understood the concept of the game and the fundamental objectives. As their coach and leader, it was my obligation to help them understand. To put my message in terms they could recognize, I made up a fairy tale.
(see Take Them by the Hand, page 34). In short, I described our soccer goal as the castle of our kingdom… our home…the place we are appointed to protect. I told the players that our most important objective was to keep others from shooting into our castle. I added that our castle was not only our home, but the place we keep our most precious treasures.
I helped them realize that so long as no one ever shot into our castle, that we could never lose. But I emphasized that to accomplish that objective each and every player had to share in that responsibility. No matter what position they played, their first duty was to keep others from shooting at our goal. There was no debate.
In more detail, we talked about the goalie staying close to our home and being the last line of defense. We talked about the defenders being positioned close in front of our castle – stopping shooters when they could and shots when they had to. We talked about our other players on the field trying to keep the ball away from the shooters whenever they could. Our focus was always to “win the ball”. A reminder that an adult referee controlled the ball and enforced all the rules of the game including the age of players, the out-of-bounds lines and how the ball may be advanced.
Defense Wins
Coaches will tell you that defense wins games. Keeping the ball out of the possession
of those who can shoot will win the day. And so, we had our strategy. We asked all the players to participate and give their best efforts. There should be no excuse for a lack of effort.
Alignment and Commitment
Most of my players understood and committed to this simple plan. Everyone had to be aligned and play together. Everyone had to believe that keeping the ball out of our goal was the most important thing. Everything else was secondary. However, at times some players would be unwilling to stick to the plan. Sometimes they thought their own selfish objectives – like scoring their own goals – were more important than those of the team. Sometimes they just did not want to give the effort. So, sometimes, even if is it uncomfortable, a coach has to move players aside and substitute players who are willing. Sometimes players need to go to the bench until they are willing to play together and protect the castle.
I am not an expert coach, but I do understand this. If everyone works together to keep the shooters away from the goal, we can not lose. Our castle, our home, and the treasure inside will be safe. This strategy worked for the teams I coached over and over – even as the players grew, they carried the lesson with them.
An Unfortunate Comparison
I thought about this story as I heard the news of the school shooting in Georgia. Stopping these tragedies has to be a critical objective for all of us. I wondered if addressing the situation this time in simple terms might make a difference. I have been told that people are more likely persuaded by hearing stories (like parables) than arguments. I wondered if telling my story might be helpful. The comparison was unfortunate, but obvious to me. Schools are our castles and the students inside them are the most precious treasure we have on this earth. We know this lesson. Our moral obligation is to do whatever we must to protect our children.
I wonder if, like my soccer players, everyone is dedicated to our primary responsibility of keeping shooters away from these sanctuaries. My concern is that many do not hold that purpose as the highest priority. They believe there are other personal considerations that are more important to themselves. Like a forward selfishly thinking of his own glory in scoring a goal, they let the ball pass into a vulnerable position. They abandon their duty and depend on the goalie and the defenders to stop the shooters. They seem to believe they do not need to be part of the solution. Some may think the solution is too complicated, but it is really not.
The reality is this. Today, there are way too many potential shooters on the field. In fact, in our country, there are more than enough soccer balls for everyone to have their own. The lack of rules has allowed more and more shooters to bring their own balls on the field. Any one of them could rush down the field and take a shot. We may not know where they will come from, or the goalie may be overwhelmed. The answer? Grown-ups should control the balls on the field and enforce reasonable rules.
Our whole community, our whole country is our team. If there are players who are not willing to embrace this strategy, then maybe we need to find substitutes who will. When “choosing teams” on election day, perhaps we need to place those players “on the bench”. Those decisions are difficult, but sometimes necessary. We must protect our castles.
Learning FOR Our Children
I have sat on the sidelines with my micro players circled around me. 
I have told them the most important thing is to protect our castle. Six-year-olds understood the concept. It is not hard to understand. With pumping hearts and red cheeks, I have watched young players work together tirelessly to execute the game plan. They were devoted to protecting each other. It is simple. It is a lesson we can learn from our children. It is a lesson we must learn FOR our children. It is not a fairy tale. Precious lives are at stake.
