For several years, a dad attended my workshops. Frequently, he reminded me that the most important lesson his father had passed on to him was, “Take care of your business.” He spoke about the business of life. I understood that advice had two elements. The first was to understand YOUR own business. Not to follow or imitate others, but to know what you were all about. The second part was simply to get your business done. Do it. As a successful basketball coach, my dad acquaintance lived that advice every day, passed it on to his children and countless student athletes.
Concern About the White House
Recently, I viewed a video made by Bruce Springsteen. In a quiet yet pointed way, he stated his concern about the state of our country. He says that we are lost. That we have lost our culture as a country. We have lost the joy in our lives. With good intentions, Springsteen suggests the current culture in the White House is the cause for the change
in our nation. He points to the lack of art in the White House. He says there is no music, literature or poetry there. There are no pets. There is no mom who tends the garden. The father never takes off his business suit. There are no times of family relaxation, like the Obamas at the beach, the Bushes fishing in Maine, the Reagans on horseback or the Kennedys playing touch football. He questions that there is no time when the residents are acting like a family.
Asking the Right Questions
The Boss is concerned. He asks, where did it all go – the fun, the joy and expression of love. Where is the leader that used to calm and soothe us, rather than divide us? Where are the cultural aspects of this country that made us great in the first place? The shared experiences and achievements that have moved us forward.
His description of the White House is spot on. He is right to ask the questions that many other folks are asking. What do we do about this? There are ways to address that question. If people are concerned about the resident of the White House and other elected officials, election day is the time to make change. There are other mechanisms to address policy and legal matters. I encourage all to join in where they feel they want to make change. Be There Dad is constrained to influence politics. However, when we talk about how we maintain our culture, our character and our family values; I feel obligated to step up. I am guided by my basketball coach dad. Perhaps we should just “take care of our business”. I believe dads can take control. We can sustain the culture we want our children to carry on. “…defining our character and charting our journey are up to us.” (General Stanley McChrystal)
Torchbearers
Optimistically, I do not believe our values nor our country are lost. Our values and our spirit as Americans are still alive. The values of our country should be set by the families who live here. In our homes, on our streets, in our neighborhoods. Dads are the ones who can carry the torch. Elected representatives should be accountable to lead us by the values we embrace.
Summer of Opportunity
Dads and Moms can lead us where we need to be. Now is an opportune time to engage. This is summer. School is out. Days are long. Flexibility abounds. We can start at home. Bring out the music. The poetry. The fun. The joy. The hope. The love.
Dust off an old movie. Pop some popcorn. Share again moments looking for Nemo. Sing along with Frozen, The Sound of Music or Mary Poppins. We know the words. Laugh and cry. Spread a jigsaw puzzle on the kitchen table. Work as a family to put it together. Leave it for a few days. Find one piece each time you pass by. Celebrate together when the final picture is revealed. Pull out a board game. Sit around a table and play. See if a conversation starts. Turn off the television and the cell phones for a bit. As Ken Burns once said, “The arts will do nothing to help defend our country, but they will make it worth fighting for.” The arts preserve our stories and the memories of who we are and how we got here. They are the images and sounds of our past that can be the inspiration to carry us forward. Fight for them.
Cook hot dogs on the grill, then top them off with s’mores. As you wipe the marshmallow
from your chin, retell the “campfire” stories you have told so many times before. Talk about good news for a while. Invite the neighbors for ice cream. Tell them something about yourself they didn’t know. I was born in Indiana. I played third base as a kid. I love the Cubs. How about you?
Change from your work clothes to shorts and a t-shirt. Find the wiffle ball and bat. Have a catch. Walk the dog.
Dance and Sing and Play
All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten told us to “learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.” Try to complete that list. What might happen if we did?
Stop at the grocery and buy your spouse a handful of daisies. For no reason.
Eat dinner together at the same table. Hold hands. Be thankful. Pray for each other, your neighbors and our leaders.
Remind your families that all these things are what truly made America great. These are the things that have kept us heading towards our true north. They are things that will make America great forever.
The Answer is Simple: The Work is Hard
I know the answer is simpler than the work it requires. The work is hard, but we must do 
it. If we feel lost, dads can lead our own families out of the wilderness. While it may be nice to have the President as our role model, dads are still heroes to their kids. We can assure there is art, laughter, and music in our own homes. If we do, I pray that others will join in and the chorus will be overwhelming.
Hope, faith and love are still alive. We don’t need to look for them elsewhere. They live in our hearts. Have the courage to open up and let them out. Take care of your business.
